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Dive into the minds of two of the most interesting Canadians in Canada. What makes us tick? What makes you tick? Join us on the Patio to find out.
Episodes
Wednesday Jul 01, 2026
Wednesday Jul 01, 2026
CLAP THOSE CHEEKS
We watched Avatar: Fire and Ash. Colonel Quaritch won't stop chasing blue booty. The AirPod epidemic. Ryan just felt like running. Taking AI interviews just to feel something.
Read the rest of this entry »Thursday Jun 18, 2026
Thursday Jun 18, 2026
SPORTS
Kurt meets his performative male rival in Montreal. Is reformer Pilates a scam? Finding good matcha (we can't). Hockey nights are cancelled in Canada. Florida Georgia Line returns before we get Fast X Part II. Plus, a very supportive surprise guest.
Read the rest of this entry »Thursday May 28, 2026
Thursday May 28, 2026
PILATES HUNT DRINK COKE ZERO
Ryan prepares for a folk fest. Kurt looks to become a travel pilates guru. The boys test Coke Zero mixed with vanilla protein powder for science. Luke Bryan’s newest summer anthem. Mark Zuckerberg getting jacked. What is HYROX...more like WHYROX. Plus, Americans are officially taking over the Patio Lanterns listenership.
Read the rest of this entry »Friday May 15, 2026
Friday May 15, 2026
MONKEY TROUBLE
Randy is back from Bali and won’t stop talking about his new travel neck pillow. He recounts his escape from what can only be described as a coordinated monkey takeover. Meanwhile, Kurt tries Pilates.
Read the rest of this entry »Tuesday Apr 14, 2026
Tuesday Apr 14, 2026
WHERE'S RANDY GOING, BINGO?
Randy says goodbye. Canada Shore returning for Season 2. Song of the Summer 2026 launch. Diet trends. Kurt’s controversial take on live music sends ripples through society. Finally, some more Silent Hill and Resident Evil thoughts.
Read the rest of this entry »Friday Apr 03, 2026
Friday Apr 03, 2026
CHOO CHOO
Newly published author Courtney Kocak joins us to discuss her memoir Girl Gone Wild, a chaotic, funny, sometimes gross and uncomfortable look at chasing dreams, femininity, and figuring it out later. We get into acting, writing, happy endings in Tokyo, live music being too loud, and TRAINS.
Read the rest of this entry »Saturday Mar 21, 2026
Saturday Mar 21, 2026
DROP IT HELL! I WANNA HEAR ABOUT THIS HOMIE!
Kurt is back and brings tales of the Philippines. Kurt writes a letter in the event of his untimely demise. Permanent Daylight Saving Time? Discussing the remainder of Canada Shore Season 1 and finale.
We are formally calling on Premier David Eby and the BC government to investigate troubling allegations that the Canada Shore cast neither spent the full summer together nor lived in a single house for even one month.
Read the rest of this entry »Thursday Feb 19, 2026
Thursday Feb 19, 2026
STILL OUR FAVORITE SHOW
- Olympic hockey talk
- Randy doesn't do his homework
- Discussing Canada Shore, episode 4 >:(
- Randy's new chiropractor
- Kurt's last episode :O
Read the rest of this entry »Tuesday Feb 03, 2026
Tuesday Feb 03, 2026
OUR NEW FAVORITE SHOW
- Patio Lanterns High S2E2
- Discussing Canada Shore, episodes 1 through 3
- Could Canada Shore use a Kurt or Ryan to mix things up?
- Fast X: Part 2, now titled "Fast Forever" FINALLY has a release date
Read the rest of this entry »Thursday Jan 22, 2026
Thursday Jan 22, 2026
UNOBTANIUM?
Kurt has set his sights on the world of reality TV. Ryan takes on Bryan Johnson - the self-proclaimed healthiest man on the planet. Canada Shore premiering soon and we are set to talk to ya about it! Jake Sully is building an army of children to fight back against golf course developers on Pandora.
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